It’s been a little over a year since I decided to bet on myself, go all-in on my dreams, and publish the book of my heart. With these kinds of milestones, there’s always a lot of reflecting, lifestyle changes, and forming new (more productive) habits.
So, I thought I’d share a few lessons I’ve learned over the past year pursuing indie publishing.
1) You can’t please everybody.
There’s a Ricky Gervais quote I love. It’s “if you try to please everyone you’ll end up pleasing no one,” and I think that’s especially true of ourselves. Up until recently, so much of my energy was focused on being what I thought people wanted me to be. It was draining and I didn’t feel fulfilled and I certainly wasn’t getting the results I wanted. Most importantly, I didn’t feel like… me.
Our art, our words, our passions, aren’t going to be for everyone, and that’s okay! The most important thing we can do is show up consistently and authentically, and the right people will find us.
2) Collaboration over comparison.
I truly believe there’s space for all authors on the shelf, but if I’m being honest some days it’s hard fighting off those I’m not good enough thoughts—which ultimately leads to doom scrolling, which leads to comparison, which leads to nowhere. Absolutely nowhere. Plus, no two journeys are the same.
Comparison is officially out and collaboration is in. Supporting each other not only boosts positivity and productivity, it helps build our communities. It can simply be: cheering each other on, bouncing ideas off each other, friending each other, and celebrating our wins—together.
I’ve started writing my wins on index cards and using them like an affirmation deck. When I have those hard days I’ll take them out and flip through them, reminding myself of all I’ve accomplished and all I have to be proud of.
3) There are no failures, there are only lessons.
When things don’t go as planned, pivoting can be hard. But there’s always a learning in there somewhere, even if it takes some reflecting to get to it, even if some of those lessons hurt. A lot of times we can’t level up or move forward until we’ve experienced certain things, because they help us develop the skills we need to take on the next phase of our goals.
So, I’ve been trying to think of mistakes less as failures and more as building blocks for my future.
4) Pivoting is part of the process.
The first big roadblock I hit with my book launch devastated me. My original cover designer ghosted me and I only had a few months until my release. I was so stressed I couldn’t sleep and I had super limited time to course correct.
Once that issue was fixed I hit another snag (in a completely different department). Then another, and another.
But then something amazing happened… the snafu’s never let up but I started outsmarting them. And while I couldn’t predict what would go wrong I knew nothing would ever go 100% as planned, so I built buffers into my schedule and I always had a backup idea.
By learning to adapt and move on, my process became smoother, more strategic.
5) Creativity is the magic but prioritization is the spark.
There’s this philosophy called Parkinson’s Law, and the general idea is that if you give or have a certain amount of time to do something that’s the amount of time it will take to get done.
For example: if you have 5 hours to tidy your garage, you’ll do it in 5 hours. Comparatively, if you have 20 minutes to tidy your garage, you’ll do it in 20 minutes.
A longer amount of time allows for more distraction. More procrastination. So, even if we have the best intentions and the most productive environment and the most creative ideas… what’s it worth if we just spend all day thinking about it? If we don’t prioritize it?
Having the idea and sitting down to implement it is a huge, celebratory step, but it’s only the first. The second, even bigger step IMO, is actively doing it. Not slipping away (mentally or physically), not setting it aside, not getting back to it later or at the last minute.
If you only had 20 minutes a day to follow your dreams, what would you accomplish in that time?
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